FC Barcelona

Broken...

Why is it so difficult to pick up the pieces and put your heart back together? Maybe it's because every guy likes to  play mind games with us... 

They all say they care, and that they want to try, and sweet talk you into thinking about the future,  but their all just waiting around for another girl. 

Sometimes you need to take a step back from all the illusions they create and realize you deserve a lot better. 
Sometimes all you need is to walk away from the addiction. 

Amazing how true this is...

Am I?

I really wish I could understand what was wrong with me myself rather having thoughts of going to a professional to talk too. Am I really that emotionally damaged. I know the nightmares keep coming back, the thoughts of what might have happened, but can I really blame anyone other then myself? 

If only...

My breathe was incomplete, my heart was incomplete, I was incomplete. 

But now the moon is full, complete in the sky, and now with you I am complete.
---- I may feel that way, but you have someone else. Could I be losing the person I 
thought could be "the one", the guy I could see my future with. 
---- I wish you knew how I really felt about you, and when you say things... I wish 
you would think about how it effects me. 
---- I'll always care about you, no matter what may happen in the future. 

Life...

  

Throughout life we have paths we need to choose, 

maybe once I met you, I decided to choose the harder 

path, with more bumps and scratches along the way. 

Choosing to always continue no matter how tough it 

gets, because I always felt at the end I would reach what 

I want, see the light and feel true happiness. I thought you 

were the one, and maybe you were, but I lost my chance, or 

maybe you were just here to teach me something, because 

no matter if I follow this path or not, there is always going 

to be a barrier between us. 

Wrong

She thought you were different, the type that would hold her close when she was scared, 

the guy who would never leave when things got tough, someone she could always talk to, 
trust with her heart, believe that the promises meant something. But once you got what 
you wanted, you showed your true colours. If you were going to hurt her, why did you
gain her trust? Why would you let her open her heart to you? Was it really all just a game? 
Did you find it funny putting her in pain? That she deserved to feel this way for someone 
like you... 

It will rain

Ugh. So why am I still allowing you to control my emotions from such a distance. 

Alone...

Being alone isn't always bad, but sometimes when your alone you can only hear your thoughts, 
the most inner subconscious of yourself. But what can I do? Give up or hold on? Is there 
any way that this could just not hurt this much? There are so many thoughts running through
my mind about you, how to understand this? why you are doing what you are? How can I know 
anything if I can't talk to you myself. Everyone tells me you came into my life to teach me something, 
it's to bad I wanted that lesson to go on longer then just this. I gave you my trust, my heart, and you
betrayed that. You used it all against me. So what now? Being alone with my thoughts is all I can do. 

Now What?

Why is it I actually felt like I needed you back in my life? You aren't the one and I always knew that, it's the reason we broke up. 
I should have known my heart belongs to someone else. Even if he doesn't see that. Now all he does is hurt me as well, no matter
how much I try to make him see, it will never work. He's chosen his path and I need to get back on mine. I just wished he would 
have given us a chance, all that time wasted playing games, we could have been happy, probably still would be. You've chosen 
to hurt me rather then care about me. I want you to be happy and I hope your decisions will make you happy. 

Maybe

It could be but maybe it was never meant to be. It could be the reason why we haven't worked out yet. It could be that 
I just wasn't good enough or maybe your still not over your ex girlfriend... so why did you chose to lead me on? 
Was it fun for you? or did you just think it might be fun to make someone feel as low as you? Maybe I was just the idiot. 
I just wish you could tell me things straight up rather then playing the mind games constantly. Besides sometimes I think I 
fell in love with you, or it could be something I wanted. 

;(

If you wanna leave your family again just because things are getting tough. I never want you to come back. 
I can't handle you leaving and coming back as you please. I want a normal family one where things stay 
steady but if you can't even try to be there for us when we need you, then I never want to rely on someone
like you again. You may be my family and blood but that doesn't mean much. Your actions speak louder then
your words. I wish I could believe in you but your deciding to leave us again. So this time please don't come back. 

Love

One day :) 

Would you lay with me?

I wish you were here :(  

Stop :(

Why do you think you can hurt me? 

Is it all because you were once hurt and now you feel it's nothing to hurt someone else? 

I thought I meant more to you but I was wrong. 

You got exactly what you wanted from me, you made me into the fool. 

I never saw it in your eyes that I was just someone you could emotionally hurt. 

I believed in the good in you. 

But you allowed me to only see what you wanted. 

I had to experience the real you. 

Those lies you told me may not make you feel bad, but I feel like a fool replaying them in my head. 

I believed them. 

I was a fool. 

My Confessions...

My confessions: 
I regret. 
I hate.
I love.
I give.
I hurt.
I care.


Yet everyone who thinks they know me, get it all wrong, they think I'm just another
mean girl, but thats all the outer shell, it's exactly who I allow you to see. Why trust
other people when they let me down more than not. No one is the person who we 
perceive them as. The only person who knows we hide it are the people who stick 
around long enough to find out. The ones who love you. And if not that person
the person staring back at you in a mirror knows you.