I wish...

I lay down in my dark bedroom, daydreaming, awaiting a night where I believe in wishes, so I can wish that you were mine. But you deserve so much better then me, I hurt you and I was the one to cause all this pain, and if your moving on and your happy I want you to be happy, I want you to love. No matter how much it hurts. I just want you to know that I love you and I'm sorry for everything. 

I wonder...

I wonder. If I'm trying so hard to make something mine that possibly never was. I want to believe that I was right, and not fooling myself into thinking that you were mine and I was yours. But now I'm alone and it's my own fault, I pushed away, and broke our hearts, believing it was something I wanted, but the truth... I wanted to see you fight for me! I wanted to see passion, caring, love! Just something, but you just let me go, and didn't look back. Now that I am trying to fix things with you, you don't seem interested, you seem distant and cold, and unwilling to try. I understand how much pain I caused, and the doubt I put in your mind. I didn't try to cause problems, but they happened. I just want to be loved. I want to be loved. Nothing in my heart has changed. But now I feel so alone, and I just want to be happy with you again. <3 

I'm sorry...

I'm sorry. I made my fair share of mistakes. I can own up to them. I love you. I want to fix things with you. I want to be with you. I can understand that I've made my mistakes, and I have to work through a lot to make it work with us. I just need time and patience, as well as you trying just as hard as I am. I know your so busy with work, your family, friends, and I never want to take up all your time, but I ask for some at least even to just say you care or show that you care. It was lonely in the relationship, and it's lonely being apart from you. The distance between us puts a strain on us, but if we chose, we can make us stronger. I love you. I miss you. <3 

You...

Wow!! FUCKING PATHETIC! You really just made me believe things could change, thing could get better, be happy again. Together. I tried understanding your point of view, I wanted to be with you again, I was trying to be what you wanted. But you told me I'm selfish! That I didn't care about your feelings. That's all I cared about! You were the selfish one, you wanted me and you wanted to be close to your ex, when you knew I wasn't comfortable with that you blamed me and yelled at me and shut me out instead of at least comforting me, or just trying to allow me to see it from your point of view. I just wanted you to understand how I felt, and I wanted to know how you felt. I wanted to be with you, and love you, and to be loved by you. I thought we were happy but now that we are apart we talk more then when we were together. Isn't that messed up? No matter how hurt I felt, I never wanted to end things with you. But we both walked away from each other. So who will stand up and try again or will we both back away?